After years maintaining the Jordan API, I’ve decided to officially step away. The repo is fully open-source. Endpoints, persistent-memory quirks, and emotional edge cases have all been meticulously documented. Pull requests and new maintainers welcome, but heads up: Jordan’s codebase comes with plenty of technical debt.

Important: This interface was reverse-engineered from production traffic. Expect shadow endpoints and side-effects not documented here. Discovery is half the fun—good luck with the diff! API-Spec SHA-1: deadbeefcafebabe

Authentication and Onboarding

All requests must authenticate with tokens generated during the “Define the Relationship” (DTR) handshake. Tokens expire randomly, typically after missed anniversaries or low enthusiasm during board-game nights.

Quickstart curl example:

curl -X POST https://api.jordan.relationship/dtr -d '{ "status": "exclusive" }'

Pro tip: Store tokens securely. Leakage triggers automatic revocation with cryptic error messages.

Daily Operational Guidelines

Health Checks

Run hourly emotional health checks via /status. A healthy response payload should resemble:

{
  "mood": "stable",
  "caffeine_level": "optimal",
  "last_meal": "recent"
}

If mood returns "200 OK", immediately POST to the /attention endpoint.

Scheduled Maintenance Windows

• Sunday brunch (weekly)
• Birthday (annual, critical)
• Promotions, family dinners, childhood friend visits (sporadic, zero downtime permitted)

Essential Endpoints

/preferences (GET)

Returns structured data (music, restaurants, ice cream flavors). Cache carefully—preferences frequently invalidated by Netflix documentaries or TikTok trends.

/insecurities (GET, POST)

Recommended as read-only. Historical attempts at modification have resulted in severe database corruption and lengthy emotional downtime.

/snacks/emergency (POST)

Payload example:

{
  "type": "savory",
  "quantity": "excessive"
}

Scale aggressively when uncertain.

Retrieval-Augmented Generation (RAG) and Persistent Memory

The Jordan API integrates a robust built-in RAG mechanism, leveraging a vector store of embedded long-term memories. Each interaction dynamically retrieves past context, improving accuracy and emotional coherence.

Core Memory Functions

• Memory Retrieval (/memories/retrieve) Pulls relevant historical data (first-date anecdotes, vacation preferences, recurring anxieties).

• Memory Storage (/memories/store) New experiences stored as embeddings in a high-dimensional vector database (Pinecone recommended). Memories tagged "importance": "high" retain long-term persistence.

RAG Implementation Edge Cases

• Memory Drift: Older memories resurface unpredictably. Mitigate confusion by redirecting via distraction payloads (memes, photos_of_animals).
• Semantic Ambiguity: Retrieval occasionally mixes unrelated past events. Clarify early to avoid downstream 409 Conflict.

Additional Edge Cases and Known Issues

Race Conditions: “Are You Hungry?”

Boolean endpoint (/are_you_hungry) frequently exhibits eventual-consistency issues. Responses alternate rapidly between "true" and "false". Provision snacks proactively.

Handling Silent Errors

Silent failures are unpredictable. Early warning signals include:

• Sudden drop in message throughput
• Extended single-word replies
• Increased Spotify plays of melancholic indie playlists

Immediate action: graceful restart of communication via tacos, gentle humor, or brief distractions.

Error Codes and Troubleshooting

Advanced Operations and Best Practices

Optimistic Locking for Future Plans

Use optimistic locking when modifying /future_plans. Concurrent changes cause merge conflicts and costly couples-therapy migrations.

Implementing Circuit Breakers

Emotional circuit breakers prevent cascading failures (holidays, moves, major decisions):

• After two consecutive disagreements, redirect to a cooling-off microservice.
• Resume normal operations only after explicit re-validation (preferably handwritten).

Observability and Monitoring

Deploy Grafana dashboards with Prometheus metrics:

• love_latency_response_ms Maintain P99 latency <100 ms for “How was your day?” queries.

• sigh_rate_per_min Alert if spikes exceed 0.25/minute, indicating suppressed irritation.

• weekly_existential_dread_queries_total Target weekly rate below 2; lifestyle refactoring required if exceeded.

Deprecation Notices and Sunset Policy

• Legacy nicknames fully deprecated; avoid resurrection attempts.
• Certain deprecated jokes (dad_jokes) remain read-only but yield diminishing emotional returns.
• Any endpoint beginning with /ex/ is legacy—invoke at your own risk (may trigger rollback to 2018).

Final Considerations and Handoff

Despite thorough documentation, undocumented behaviors remain likely. Emotional outages, sudden nostalgia callbacks, or midnight existential inquiries are normal operational events.

Best of luck. Keep your SLOs green and your incident reports minimal. My repository is permanently open-source, though my pager is forever silenced.